True ancestral Property

24th June is my father's birthday. I have so many memories which can last till my end. But there are a few things which I didn't share with anyone.Today I can talk about this. Earlier I was afraid or to be honest I was egoistic not to share my experiences.

My father physically left when I was preparing for Final Year exams which were just 20 days away. It was a shock for me when I could not even meet my father in the last minutes as I was doing combined studies elsewhere. My father probably knew and last sentence he told to my mother was "Don't worry" and he went in to meditation. By the time he was taken to hospital they declared he was no more.

It was a shock for me and due to many rituals required in my community I didn't even continue my studies till 1 day before the start of exams. Thanks to all my friends who stood by me and they too ignored their studies and helped me. Even in studies they were with me. We studied every night and slept in the afternoon after giving the exams. The routine continued till exams are over. The fact that I still did well in the exams prove that the foundation given by my professors and father was sufficient to the extent that I didn't need last minute preparations.

After I was impacted by some of the remarks about my father from some of the well wishers, although I didn't pay much attention I experienced the reality later. When I went to Kharagpur, it was my first travel independently. I was already down with my father leaving us, and these first time activities were putting more pressure. I was so scared that I sincerely believed that my berth in the train would be occupied by someone, and I was wondering on how to deal such cases. Luckily there were no such issues :). To come out of loneliness I tried to be as cheerful as possible and made as many friends as possible. I thought I earned lot of friends and wisdom after I joined IIT Kharagpur. But job was still in my mind as we were having some insecure feeling about our financial status. Many well wishers commented during the rituals to my father, that my father didnt leave any property or funds for me. Some even criticized him for spending all earnings for others either his brothers& sister or his friends. There were a few who told that my father is not a practical man, trusted everyone and helped them without planning for future. I used to be confused because my father told me to trust everyone till I am cheated. It is one input I have been following till date. I had a few bitter experiences but still my father's logic is that the damage is more, if I do not trust a genuine person than trusting everyone by default.

I applied for every job that appeared in the News paper ads. Attended 3,4 interviews and NTPC was one of them. I did the interview for about 10 minutes and didn't understand whether I did well or not. But within a few weeks I received the offer letter. I was the first to get job and was very proud about it. I needed to execute a Surety Bond for 20000 Rs/- (during 1989 it was a big amount). But I was confident about getting the surety as I had many friends and only friends. Many of my friends were actually employees of some organizations and joined as research scholars through their organizations. For me, I needed some one who has PAN number and can sign the surety document.

My confidence was completely lost because none of the friends proved to be good enough to help me. Some people said they were asked not to sign by their astrologers. Some said they dont remember their PAN number. at the end, I was still roaming 1 day before my travel to Delhi to join NTPC.That was when I met one of my professors who was doing research. He asked me on what was my problem and simply asked me to meet him at home with filled document. When I went to him next day he signed the document in the places marked for signatures. I asked him to read the document. He told me that my father never did that while helping him. He also told me that my father gave for a surety of 1 rupees and there was no need for me to thank him.
I realized what my father left for me.

When I went to join in NTPC, the personal officer told me that one Mr. Sastry was asking about me every day. I had no clue about who is Mr. Sastry. When I spoke to him he said he is childhood friend of my father and asked me to meet him in gulabibagh. When I met him I realized that Mr.Sastry was the Panel head who interviewed me for NTPC. He actually noticed my fathers features and checked my details to confirm it. He helped me while I was in Delhi.

I was posted in the border of India close to Bangladesh and due to all memories of losing my father I used to be alone. that's when I met Chandrasekhar who was fan of my father. My father taught him meditation because of which he was relieved from long term Asthma. Once he knew my identity he took care of me till my mother joined me.

In the all the sequence of events, I felt as if my father was behind me taking care of me at every step. My father by all means lived a practical life in spiritual sense. The statement looks puzzling but he reached a spiritual level from where he believed the god in true spirit. In the last few minutes he didn't bother about seeing his kids, didn't want to do any handing over. All he said to my mother was "Don't worry". And he went in to transcendental meditation which he tried to teach everyone in the world for the benefit of universe.

I realized that I still need to earn on my own and is still living on what my father left for me.
All I can do is just follow him to reach atleast 10 percent of what he reached.

Do we know we are all living Corrupt Life?

There is a huge noise from all over the country about respected Anna and Baba Ramdev's Protests against Corruption. Both Baba Ramdev and Anna Hazare are the most respected people and are right people to drive this and I hope there will be a change. But I am a bit cynical about all of us who are quire excited about this as if we are all exceptions to corruptions only a few people on headlines of News Paper are corrupt. If we understand what does it mean by being corrupt, I believe we are all corrupt at every level. Did we realize that?

First of let me try to make a simple definition of what do we mean by corruption. In simple terms it is about attempting to get more than what we deserve at the cost of others. If we understand this, are we not corrupt. In our daily life what do we do? In a buffet I dont mind Queue and get the dish I want and it is an accepted practice. In a traffic, I know the people deserve to go free left, but I block them. I know I need to take U turn but I go in a wrong way. I sell a few stocks and dont pay tax because I dont want to pay. I submit a wrong bill for reimbursement and claim tax exemption. I take some office stationary to home and make some personal calls using office resources.

Interesting point is that we make a logic to support that we are doing it because of socalled valid reason. I will say making a few calls is insignificant compared to crores of rupees eaten by some other. I will say by claiming a wrong reimbursement company doesnt lose because they anyway pay that amount as taxable (I conveniently forget that the country lost some Income tax from me). But we forget that the similar logics are built by even those who do corruption at large amount. If we ask Suresh Kalmadi (I am not saying he is guilty as he is yet to be proved) he may say, he got the money from mad sports lovers and not from poor people. If we ask the same question to Lalit Modi he would tell the same thing. Similarly an industralist will say he created lot of employment in that process and he taking some amount is not wrong. Now the question is should we say we are all corrupt at same level? I will say Yes. Because the examples I gave about the regular corruption that we are doing are for very small benefits and we are regularly doing only because we can do that. Just imagine if the guy on the right track beats the guy who comes in wrong way and obstruct. Just imagine if people who break the queue are beaten up by others. We will not do it. The conclusion is that we do it because we can get away doing that even though we dont gain much. So what if we get in to an opporunity of eating up 1 crore and if we know we can get away? Dont we yield to the temptation? I will say we will definitely yield because we are all brought up in corrupt life.

I will say the true improvement happens when I tell my son to follow the rules irrespective of whether they are supervised by some one or not. Means follow the principle in true conviction and not based on how stringent are the controls.

Today Anna may succeed in getting the Lokpal bill introduced. But that will be governed by some of us who are all brought up in corrupt environment. It is in our blood to bypass the rules and check if there is a short cut. So even if I sound cynical I have a doubt if it works. And when I saw that Anna and Baba are supported by some of the notorious politicians and business men we can understand where it will go.

I wish there will be a change in life. But let all of us start changing out life style and see if we can live without corruption wherever possible. If I wait till the green light comes in a traffic, I dont lose much. Can I try doing that everytime I am in the traffic? Instead of showing the urgency on traffic can I prepare a few minutes early and avoid rushing and causing inconvenience to others?

If I follow the queue instead of looking for short cut I may spend a few minutes. Why cant I try that? I see many of my educated colleagues not minding Q while having Buffet lunch.Why cant we follow Q instead of irritating others?
If I go for getting driving license through formal process I may need a couple of days leave. Why cant I try that? I still need to know driving.
By claiming a wrong reimbursement I may get a few hundreds of Rupees  tax savings. Cant I live without that?
Instead of carrying office stationary, can I buy for my own? Did we ever check how much does it really cost if we buy? Why cant we spend that much for our requirements?

If we make a start through living less corrupt atleast in the small scale I am sure it will be a habit at every level.

Let us attempt to live pure life atleast in the areas where it is possible. I am sure we will start findings more areas where we can live without corruption. I hope I am not sounding too optimistic.